I'm still bloody terrible at this

I still don't update often enough. Bah.

Well. I was going to retype my whole spiel about my history paper that somehow got deleted from my last blog, but I'll skip it and just inform you that even though Colin scared the crap out of me and made me think I'd gotten a D, I really pulled off an A. BECAUSE I AM JUST THAT AWESOME! And a history genius.

It was really nice to see Colin again. I missed him! He is just such a genuinely nice person and I like hearing what he has to say about what we've been doing in class. Also he was really happy that I started that topic about Germinal on Moodle once I'd finished reading it. Apparently the profs were really happy with him and the rest of the TAs were jealous. Ha! Wonder if that had anything to do with the A I got... nah, just kidding.

Wednesday was fine, obv. Latin and Greek still make sense, thankfully. Had a good tutorial with Fisher and then just spent the rest of the day goofing around with Natalia and Mike. We didn't go to lecture because they were screening Full Metal Jacket and we'd already watched it. Earlier that morning I bought a regular chai latte from Second Cup. I put two packets of Splenda in it and shook some cinnamon on top. Just so you know - it's an orgasm. In a fucking cup. It was amazing. I had one this morning but there was no cinnamon, only vanilla powder :( IT'S NOT THE SAME! But the hot emo guy was working so I can get over the absence of cinnamon.

Lost was good Wednesday. Ooer. I can't even remember my days anymore.

Yesterday was history lecture and then doc appointment, which was fine. I just have blood in my urine and might die of kidney failure. Haha kidding. We don't know what's wrong with me but I've got to book an appointment with Dr. Langer so he can refer me to a urologist. Chances are nothing's wrong. Sometimes having a small amount of blood in one's urine is hereditary, and pretty much all of Dad's family has it. They've just got to be wary because I'm at risk of diabetes because of my PCOS. PCOS has to be the fucking worst non-fatal condition to have. It fucks up your life, seriously. Sometimes I don't know how I wake up in the morning. I'm just going to fall apart one day anyway!

Just a word of note - www.failblog.org and www.fmylife.com are two really fucking amazing websites for a few - i.e. nine thousand - good laughs.

I can't really think of anything else to say. I'm at 581 words in my essay. I sat staring at the screen for a while last night. Barely wrote anything. Couldn't focus. A few reasons why. Can't talk about them. General sexual frustration is probably the root problem. Amazing how much hold it can have over us. I need to shut myself off.

I am working tomorrow and it makes me want to cry. Between work and school, I won't have a day off until the 16th, which I will likely use to study for exams. (By the way, no midterm-period history exam, it will be on March 12th, and part two of the newspaper essay isn't due til the 10th, yay!)

I am contemplating booking Valentine's Day off, but I don't know yet whether or not I'll need a day off for a weekend exam. I just wanted to go chill with Anna on the 14th since we'll both be alone. And I was going to go downtown to buy a crop! Still not sure if I can take the day off though. We'll see. I hope the fucking inspector doesn't come tomorrow. I don't think he usually comes on a Saturday but he did that time I took the day off to meet my mates for Chrimb - December 20th, it was.

I am just really unsatisfied with my job. I need a new one.

Good news though - History of Astronomy is offered over SU term so I'll be taking it this summer :D